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How Exes Propel You to Prevail and Rediscover Yourself?

Do you know when they say you need darkness to appreciate light? A similar concept can be applied when it comes to your exes. You may have needed to cross paths with that person to rediscover your self-worth. Whether you agree or not, it makes sense, as absurd as it may sound.

Often, the sun tends to shine brighter after the storm has passed. As crazy as the torrent had been, you always had the power to withstand the tribulations you imagined to be impossible.

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Be grateful for the storm, as it was a crucial element in pinpointing the immense inner strength you were blessed with. The newly discovered strength is a major component in battling the many challenges one could have encountered. It is an instrument of the universe to steer you in the right direction, although it doesn’t seem like that at the time. 

We exhibit the tendency to be hard-headed, so much so that the only way we listen is by stumbling continuously and standing back up.

The hurt from those slip-ups could be unbearable, momentarily. Commonly, they serve as wake-up calls set in place to assist in recognizing the valuable gem we are. As they say, a diamond needs pressure and darkness to form. Without those two elements, a diamond cannot materialize, therefore remaining a simple and ordinary rock.

Life places certain people on our journey to redirect us toward the path of rediscovery our worth and self-confidence. Occasionally, we are too blind to notice it otherwise. These individuals are appointed to be part of the story for only a few chapters. And yet at times, they have the power to derail the entire plot. It is what exes regularly do.

Although it is inconceivable in the moment, the role of exes is to give us a boost in rediscovering a part of ourselves that was unknown or deemed lost.

Who you were before and after the breakup are two totally different individuals.

Ultimately, prioritizing your wants and needs will take the spotlight, eliminating the things that no longer serve you. Despite all the hardships faced, it propelled you to become more assertive and courageous.

Now, more than ever, one will have the stamina to defend, with tooth and nail, who they are. The self-love gained from the heartbreak is a significant learning experience. The heartbreak served as the steppingstone needed to reignite the flame from deep within that had been dimmed for the longest.

The inspiration for this post struck unexpectedly as I reflected on how far I’ve come since being blindsided a few years ago. If my heart had not been shattered as it was, this blog would not exist, and I wouldn’t have realized the importance of self-love.

Many might perceive the concept as foolish, especially after enduring so much pain, but it is not. Reflecting on the past, an intense desire for acceptance clouded my vision, blurring numerous red flags. Additionally, being in my mid to late twenties didn’t help matters. The issue wasn’t that I sought affection. The dilemma caused my standards to plummet to the extent that accepting the bare minimum seemed more than enough. I’m grateful for things to have turned out the way they did, though it was tough at the beginning.

I can say with certainty that people come into our lives to help us elevate ourselves to something bigger and better.

Consider Shakira and Miley at present. If they hadn’t experienced heartbreaks, each artist would not be dominating the charts with their songs (the crazy thing is that both of their exes look alike).

Sure, heartbreaks are painful, but it is up to us to decide what we are going to do with all that ache. Everything happens for a reason; it is up to us to make the best of the situation. There are two options: 1) let the pain consume you or 2) view it as a tool to propel you to prevail. The decision is yours!

Stay Beautiful XoXo

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  1. January 30, 2023 / 12:28 am

    A very interesting post! I agree with you that each new relationship we enter provides us with new opportunities for growth. Thanks for sharing.

    • shesdioma
      February 1, 2023 / 7:14 pm

      Exactly!!! There are lessons that otherwise would have been learned if it wasn’t for previous relationships. ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. February 2, 2023 / 6:31 pm

    I love that you pointed this out, because it is so true. We have to experience the bad times sometimes to know and appreciate the good. Great post!

  3. February 6, 2023 / 4:31 am

    The Advice Everyone in a New Relationship Absolutely Needs to Hear ยท Keep the Past in the Past ยท Don’t Make Comparisons ยท Look at Actions More Than .

  4. February 7, 2023 / 1:55 am

    Great Post! I agree with you.. We have to experience the bad times sometimes to know and appreciate the good.

    • shesdioma
      February 17, 2023 / 6:02 pm

      Thanks! Exactly, in the end everything fall in its rightful place.

  5. January 3, 2024 / 6:21 pm

    This quote is so true! “I can say with certainty that people come into our lives to help us elevate ourselves to something bigger and better.” Some people come into our lives but are there as a lesson, not as a permanent fixture!

    • shesdioma
      January 5, 2024 / 6:23 pm

      I’m glad you were able to identify with that quote. Some people aren’t permanent fixture in our life. If we don’t want to get hurt more by them we have to let them go. Thank you for your comment ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. January 3, 2024 / 9:48 pm

    Love this post. I think past loves help us prioritize what we truly want and need in life.

    • shesdioma
      January 5, 2024 / 6:17 pm

      Exactly! In a way, it reveals to us that what once we through as enough is not enough in fact, we deserve so much better. Thank you for your comment ๐Ÿ™‚

    • shesdioma
      January 5, 2024 / 6:12 pm

      Thank you for your comment ๐Ÿ™‚

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