Time To Reevaluate Your Dating Approach for Success in Relationships
With age, we come to the acknowledgment that the universal playbook for dating is useless among its various tactics. If a connection is genuine, then both individuals will do everything in their power to overcome whatever challenges that can arise without hesitation. No “buts” or “ifs”!
The Downside of Approaching Dating as a Strategic Game
Many, including myself, have treated dating as a game, believing that by employing a specific strategy would result in finding a partner. However, while this approach might work for some, for others, it simply does not.
The truth is, no strategy or clever tricks can make an individual stay if they’re not genuinely invested in sticking around. In the end, no carefully crafted text message has the power to deter them from leaving you. Perhaps they entered your life to teach you a lesson in which you needed to learn.
In the article titled ‘People Are Dating All Wrong, According to Data Science’ by Seth Stephens-Davidowitz, a thorough analysis was conducted on the works of scientist Samantha Joel, who aimed to predict the core components of relationship happiness. Joel’s findings revealed that “many of the traits that are most competed for in the dating market do not correlate with romantic happiness, this suggests that many people are dating wrong” ((Stephens-Davidowitz).
Liberate Yourself from Self-Imposed Boundaries
Now contemplate this: Have you ever caught yourself thinking, ‘Oh, I shouldn’t swipe left on him because he is so my type!’ or ‘Let me swipe right on him because he’s does not appear to be a player.’ These kinds of thoughts have crept into our mind at least once, haven’t they? But why? Because we assume that by going with the safe option will shield us from future heartache. Well, screw that tactic!
Be as delusional as possible and go after that incredibly attractive guy. Even if the two of you don’t turn out to match, you went for want you wanted. That right there is a victory in itself. You should be proud of yourself for going after what you wanted. Who cares if he replies or not? You took the shot, and that is what truly matters.
We often become too entangled in our own thoughts, convincing ourselves not to reach for the stars because they seem too distant. But who says they are unreachable? Do whatever you desire, as long as it brings a smile to your face without compromising your values or the respect you have for yourself.
It is time to put aside those gloomy thoughts as we are here on this Earth for only a limited time, so why not make the most of it? Unfortunately, we’ve been led to believe that most attractive individuals are self-absorbed jerks. While there might be some truth to that, don’t let it stop you from swiping right on someone based on those preconceived notions.
Let’s swipe right on those who catch our eye, without being too modest by only going for average individuals. Holding onto these belief, could be preventing you from experiencing a deeper connection with someone especial. Choosing the safe option won’t protect you from a potential heartache.
Being with an average individual won’t necessarily ensure that he/she will prioritize not hurting your feelings over their owns. Similarly, being with an attractive person doesn’t automatically mean they will break your heart. If fate dictates that your heart will be broken, it will happen no matter of the person’s level of attractiveness.
Never let your insecurities stop you from going after what you want. Often, we don’t chase after our desires because our minds tend to drift toward the worst-case scenario. All the while, making us believe that we aren’t good enough for the things we truly desire. Erase those negative thoughts and loudly affirm to yourself, ‘I deserve the best!’ Better believe it, because we all deserve the best.
Celebrate The Courage To Beyond Comfort Zones
Don’t be disheartened if things don’t unfold as you originally envisioned. Instead, celebrate the fact that you had the courage to try and venture beyond your comfort zone. There’s no limit to the number of attempts available; in fact, the possibilities are infinite.
So, if you want to do something, go for it. It might be intimidating, but you will be glad you did. Trust me, it’s better to take action than to live with the constant nagging feeling of wondering what could have been.
Go for what you want; if you don’t, you will end up regretting it!
Stephens-Davidowitz, S. (2022, May 10). People are dating all wrong, according to Data Science. Wired. https://www.wired.com/story/data-marriage-behavior-love-psychology-romance/