If You Have to Question It, Then It’s Not the Right Love for You

No one is going to love you the way you deserve, if you don’t first treat yourself with the care and tenderness you undoubtedly are entitle to. That is the honest truth.

To recognize or have the slightest idea of what that profound connection is we ought to primary search for it within ourself. Commonly, the type of love we are actively looking for can be found internally as oppose externally. Unfortunately, we tend to settle for the initial sign of admiration that is presented without contemplating whether it is the right one. But how can we learn to differentiate between one love versus the other if we were never exposed to it? I’m here to tell you that loving yourself immensely is the first step giving you a blueprint to the type devotion you truly deserve.

The Type of Love Worthy of Your Time

Failure to pinpoint the kind of affection worthy of our time can lead us to mistake meaningless endearment for love. Take, for instant, an emotionally draining bond can be easily identified by many as the greatest love there is. Why is that, you might ask? This can be attribute to being unaware of the importance of being treated with the utmost adoration and compassion. Consequently, it can be a driving force of confusion by prompting us to compare temporary affection with a long-lasting romance. It doesn’t work that way.

Not everything that sparkle can be considered deserving of your time. Difficulties usually arise due to one’s inability to determine if an individual is right for us or not. The underlying lesson here is that just because something is shiny and appealing to the eye doesn’t imply it is valuable.  That said, not everything that glows, except for gold, should be yearned for. 

Contemplate this, not all efforts are created equal, especially when executed by doing the bare minimum. Until, we do the work to improve and learn to love ourselves unconditionally that is the beginning of magnifying our self-discovery. Take, for instant, to retrieve gold or diamonds one has to excavate a cave, which is labor intensive. Although it is a lot of work, one wouldn’t give up for the simple fact of it being hard. In the end, obtaining the desire outcome will make all the effort endured worthwhile. The same metaphor can be applied to relationships.

No Two Loves Are the Same

Love and raindrops have something in common. At first glance, each one might seem indistinguishable from afar, although they can be vastly different. Different the sense that not all affection have a strong structure in the way admiration is given, received and sustained. To fully understand the kind of romance that is right for you, it’s necessary to first experience heartbreak and disappointments. Those heartbreaks and disappointments will serve as the catalyst needed to help you to pinpoint exactly what you want and don’t want from a relationship. 

Due to disheartening experiences, we learn to become self-reliant when determining the kind of romance we welcome to take residency in our lives. Legitimately, each of us deserve to be with an individual who is willing to move Heaven and Earth for us. Prior to obtaining that, we must absorb the importance of executing the act of giving ourselves everything, if not more than what we can expect an external source to provide. The initial step is to have self-trust and the capability to stand on our two feet no matter what.

Don’t Mistake Material Things for Love

Mistaking material things for deep affection is a deception many have fallen prey to. Granted, we all like material things, yet those personal belongings does not signify true loyalty. Receiving an expensive gift, for example, could be seen as this big gesture of devotion to outsiders. What outsiders might be unaware of is the true meaning behind such lavish gifts, which in the end camouflages the gift giver’s ulterior motives.  

In the example above, for instant, the present here was given as a manipulation tactic to ask for forgiveness after being unfaithful. It isn’t that you are not special enough to receive a grand act of affection, but rather it is that they only did it to get something in return, in this case your forgiveness. Mind you, they are not the gift giving type. 

Saying you aren’t deserving of being gifted expensive gifts is the last thing I want to imply. The honest  truth is, that we all deserve to be spoiled and pampered. However, it is undeniable that some do the openly displayed of affection with a second intention in mind. Reflect on that for a minute! What I am trying to aim at is to show how the act of giving expensive gifts can at times be used to express insincere love, while also looking to get something in return.

Is It Real Love?

Unfortunately, for a select few, the value of love lies in the things that can be bought with money. But is money enough to make a love honest and real? Would they be available when you need them to dry your tears? Or are they just one call away and at your doorsteps when hardships arise? What would happen when money and the material things stopped coming? Would you think that the love is gone once you no longer receive expensive gifts? I encourage you to think about the answers to those questions for a moment. 

That’s not deep love! Instead, it is a selfish adoration for material things. The reality is that when someone loves you deeply and genuinely, that love will survive the test of time and is not easily defeated. Yet, when admiration is based on a monetary exchange, it can disappear very quickly leaving you with nothing but useless material possessions. Ultimately, you will find yourself empty handed in the end.

Stay Beautiful XoXo