I’m not going to sugarcoat it. This is not a donut shop and I’m not a pastry baker who coats everything in sugar. 

Getting your heart broken the first time is the worse pain you will ever experience. A pain that can be compare to losing your childhood pet or someone close to you. The worse!

Experiencing with your first heartbreak is not the hard part. The hard part is learning to navigate with the unbearable pain caused by someone you deeply cared for. You  try to act like it doesn’t hurt, even though you feel like your world is crashing down. Not only that, but you are in denial when it come to pretending it doesn’t affect you as much as it does. It affects you way more than you care to admit!

One of the worse thing you can do for you first heartbreak is deny it exist. By denying it, you are only prolonging the recuperation period and you don’t want that. The sooner you can see things for what they were, the faster you can heal from it. No amount of alcohol, attention from the opposite sex, or acting nonchalant will make the process easier to deal with. They might assist you in forgetting about your ex for the time being, but it is only temporary. And we don’t want that!

From experience, I can confidently tell you that the best way to deal with a heartbreak is to stop resisting the hurt that the person inflicted on you by ending the relationship. If you want to cry, cry until you have no more tears left. If you want to eat that box of chocolate, eat it. Lastly, if you want to lie in bed the whole weekend, lie in bed.  But tomorrow or two days from now, I want you to stand up from that bed, wipe your tears, and continue being the amazing individual that you are.

With your strength you will be able to get through this despite the hurt. Take it day by day, and if that doesn’t work, take it hour by hour. The important thing is to continue on and to not wallow in misery. Maybe, you weren’t actually in love with them, but with the illusion of them. An illusion that stopped you from seeing things exactly as they were. Writing a goodbye letter will help you to put things into perspective giving you a clear understanding of why things had to end the way they ended. View your first heartbreak as a form of self-discovery because you definitely won’t be the same person as you were before.

Your Dating Confidant, Dioma xoxo