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Pain Is Necessary In The Pursuit of Your Deepest Desires

How Pain Can Propel You Through Life’s Discomfort to Obtain What You Truly Deserve?

At some stage in our lives, we have experienced hurt while searching for our desires. Let me tell you, it hurts like crazy. You might think it’s the end of the world, swearing strongly to never put yourself out there again. What if I told you that the pain is necessary for you to realize that you deserve much better than anything you were once offered? Does that make the pain more bearable, knowing that it is only temporary?

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Is Pain Necessary for Growth?

If you are destined to get hurt, you will get hurt, despite the lengths you go through to avoid it. Some pains are necessary, compelling you to realize that there is more to life than what is currently known to you. Pain can be an invisible force that propels you to desire more from life and strive to become better. It is the source that enables you to recognize that what you tolerated previously is not acceptable. You deserve so much better.

It is much easier to remain in the familiar than to venture into the unknown. The unknown forces us to break away from our natural habitat and become problem solvers, rather than sitting back to observe as life continues without us fully enjoying it. At times, we are in desperate need of that push to open our eyes and grasp the beauty of life and how magnificent it can be when we release fear. Life isn’t black and white, as often portrayed; rather, it is filled with colors often disregarded by our inability to see beyond what is directly in front of us.

Nathaniel Katz discusses in the article The Impact of Pain Management on Quality of Life the concept of pain by stating:

“One of the greatest tolls exacted by pain is on quality of life. Pain is widely accepted to be one of the most important determinants of quality of life, which can be defined as an individual’s ability to perform a range of roles in society and to reach an acceptable level of satisfaction from functioning in those roles.”

Don’t Let Fear Be Your Shadow

Fear is like a black-and-white shadow that persistently follows you around, whispering in your ear not to go through certain paths when you definitely should. Without a doubt, it can be frightening, frequently accompanied by a great amount of discomfort. And yet, try to subconsciously acknowledge your capacity to not let the pain of discomfort prevent you from moving towards your desired destination. If you allow fear to overpower your desires, you might find yourself wondering about the potential outcome. As a result, regret will be roaming around, pondering on what could have happened. If only you had the courage necessary to continue in the direction of your desires.

Why Pain Cannot Be Avoided?

Pain is unavoidable, no matter how you view it. Everything worth having requires sacrifice, sweat, and tears. Take a baby, for example; to learn how to walk, a baby will have to fall a thousand times and often experience pain from those falls. Does the baby’s determination to walk decrease just because it is hard and painful? No, it doesn’t!

On the contrary, it propels them to keep trying because they know that something better is waiting for them. Unfortunately, at some point in our lives, pain becomes something that should be avoided at all costs. Granted, some pain should be avoided. Meanwhile, other type of pains should be used as a mechanism to push us to want to better ourselves.

Along with experiencing pain, getting hurt comes with the territory of life. Without pain, there would not be any hurt, and without hurt, there would not be an appreciation for the good moments. It is apparent how everything is interconnected.

Life Can Be Painful But Also It Can Be Joyful

As the Buddha once wisely said, life involves both suffering and joy. Take, for instance, not obtaining the job you profoundly desired or being dumped by a partner. Even though these scenarios are totally different, they share one thing in common, and that is pain. The pain of not getting the outcome that you wanted is like putting all your eggs in one basket, only to find them all shattered in the morning. It’s a distressing feeling that teaches you to practice caution when it comes to where you put your trust.

If you have the desire to do something, go and do it, even if it might be scary. Sure, doing something for the first time can be terrifying. Still, don’t let it stop you from pursuing what you want. It is scarier to live with the feeling of not doing something and wondering “what if” than to do it and overcome whatever is holding you back. You can do anything you set your mind to; you must believe in yourself.

Pain Is Necessary In The Pursuit of Your Deepest Desires1
Pain Is Necessary In The Pursuit of Your Deepest Desires2
Pain Is Necessary In The Pursuit of Your Deepest Desires3


Katz, N. (2002, July). The impact of pain management on quality of life – journal of pain and … Journal Of Pain and Symptom Management . https://www.jpsmjournal.com/article/S0885-3924(02)00411-6/pdf

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  1. February 11, 2024 / 6:04 pm

    Such a great post. Since accepting that with joy also comes pain, I am getting on much better in life. We can’t control which one we get, but we can control how we respond to the circumstances.

    • shesdioma
      February 12, 2024 / 2:51 pm

      Exactly! Pain is an inevitable-a part of life. It is up to us to view pain as a learning lesson instead of this thing that should be avoided at all cost. I’m so proud of you for learning to deal with pain. Thank you for commenting 🙂

  2. February 12, 2024 / 1:53 pm

    Very beautifully put. Painful moments and experiences helps us learn and grow. Thanks for sharing!

    • shesdioma
      February 12, 2024 / 2:41 pm

      I’m glad you enjoy it! My hope for this post was to show that even though it might be hurtful at the moment better things are ahead. Thank you for the comment 🙂

  3. February 15, 2024 / 12:41 pm

    When we experience pain it also gives us an opportunity to experience joy on the flipside. We can appreciate the good times more acutely.

    • shesdioma
      February 15, 2024 / 1:19 pm

      Nicely said! Without pain we would not know what joy and happiness feels like. Thank you for your comment! 🙂

  4. February 18, 2024 / 3:56 pm

    WOW this is such a unique perspective on pain that I’ve never heard before :O Thank you so much for sharing this amazing info!

    • shesdioma
      February 20, 2024 / 6:16 pm

      I’m so glad you enjoyed it! While pain is awful, it can at times be unavoidable. Also, pain should be used as a tool to encourage us to want more out of life, even though it could be difficult at times. Thank you for your comment! 🙂

  5. February 19, 2024 / 9:16 am

    Love the post. It got me emotional thinking of what I went through and how far I have come. I wish I never experienced that pain, I know I don’t deserve it but then again I wouldn’t be who I am without it.
    Stronger, Wiser, and a Survivor!

    • shesdioma
      February 20, 2024 / 6:20 pm

      That’s right! You’re Amazing! We all have gone through battles that make us strong teaching us to appreciate life a little bit more. Thank you for your comment! 🙂

  6. March 9, 2024 / 8:05 am

    I think you are right. We do have to experience pain to grow and learn how to deal with it. You have to experience the lows to appreciate the highs. I think, ultimately, it does make us stronger. I enjoyed this post – thank you for your thoughts on this matter.

    • shesdioma
      March 22, 2024 / 2:51 pm

      As they say, you need darkness to appreciate the light. The same thing can be apply to the pain that it takes to make our goals a reality. Those who seriously want to achieve their objectives in life are willing to go through the pain that is require to get there. Thank you for your comment! 🙂

  7. April 11, 2024 / 7:29 am

    This is so true, and a really powerful exploration of how pain can actually be a part of our growth. It’s not easy to grow in this way, of course, but once we find a a way through, there is a lot we can learn. Great post!

    • shesdioma
      April 11, 2024 / 7:30 pm

      Pain is sometimes presented as this force we need to in order to fully realize what we are capable of. Thank you for commenting! 🙂

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